Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris does not use revision control software. None of his code has ever needed revision. Holy Paraffin Mark it zero! Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on? Surrender to my will! Calmer than you are. She's dead... Wrapped in plastic. Ah, Jesus Christ! Jesus Christ, Doc, you disintegrated Einstein!

Captain Teemo on duty.

Audrey, there are many cures for a broken heart. But nothing quite like a trout's leap in the moonlight.